When Someone Becomes an Unexpected Ally and Publicly Defends You
You may be impressing someone in ways your enemies and critics have not seen, resulting in someone feeling moved to defend your against them
In the midst of intense criticism and pain, someone may see objectively see you for your best self and the positives you have contributed and bring to the world. They publicly defend you, maybe unexpectedly, when many don’t or won’t and instead focus on their unhappy experiences, unflattering impressions and negative feelings.
We never know who’s watching closely, remembering and walking away impressed.
Sharon Osbourne, the now-widow of rock singer Ozzy Osbourne, has endured a lot of poor feedback over the years, some of it certainly deserved, yet she has had someone come to her defense, at a time it is really needed more than ever, when she is grieving.
It’s a story reported by Eric Todisco at the New York Post.
“Daniel Bukszpan, author of the 2023 biography ‘Ozzy At 75: The Unofficial Illustrated History,’ exclusively spoke to The Post after Ozzy Osbourne’s death and defended his wife Sharon Osbourne from the negative reputation she’s had in the music industry,” Todisco wrote.
“Within the heavy metal subculture, Sharon Osborne has a reputation as this evil shrew, puppet master, controlling him from off-stage or whatever,” Bukszpan said.
It’s a point about which he vehemently disagrees.
“The truth of it is she met him after he had been fired from Black Sabbath,” Bukszpan told Todisco. “He was borderline homeless; could easily be just a couple of months away from walking down the street with a shopping cart, barking at people.
“She found him in that state and said, ‘I think I can turn this guy into a solo artist,’ when everyone had completely given up on him.”
Bukszpan clearly believes that has been forgotten, diminished or unfairly dismissed. He wants it to be remembered or now known, because Sharon Osbourne’s reputation doesn’t reflect for everyone that hard, emotional rollercoaster, hard work.
In fact, Bukszpan added, because of her, Ozzy became “more famous” when she became his solo manager, after he was told to leave the band, Black Sabbath.
“And due to her ability to corral him and direct him and that sort of thing, she made him one of the biggest stars in the world,” he said.
It’s not just that though. She did far more than drive him to professional stardom. She was the difference between, Bukszpan insisted, life and death.
“I believe she kept him alive the whole time,” he said.
For those who disagree with or mock that claim, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s a point about which Ozzy agreed.
“If I’d not met Sharon, and fallen in love with Sharon, I’d be dead,” he admitted.
”Without any shadow of a doubt, I would be dead.
“Through her tough love, she kept my head above water. She kicked my butt. … Sharon’s a fighter.”
That’s why Bukszpan will stand up in the media for Sharon Osbourne.
“I sometimes get heavy metal people mad at me because I’ll always defend her…” he said. “It’s sort of the way some Beatles fans see Yoko Ono,” the music expert continued. “Like that she was just this woman interfering.
“No, she kept him alive and made him one of the biggest stars in the world for over 40 years. And gave him a family who he clearly loves and means everything to him.”
Bukszpan saw a bigger, truer picture than Sharon Osbourne’s enemies and critics. He could have quietly held on to what he factually knew. He could have kept it in his tiny personal or professional circle.
Yet he showed courage, stepped out into the light and a figurative line of fire and stood up for someone who isn’t necessarily someone that is easy to defend and say nice things.
Why? Sharon Osbourne, who married Ozzy in 1982, “has been known to be unpleasant at times,” Bukszpan said. “That’s not a secret either.”
What he just said is likely very much an understatement, meaning that Sharon self-inflicted some of the unwanted reputation on herself. Yet, that doesn’t mean she is fully deserving of all the misery she’s had to endure, at least according to Bukszpan.
Someone is Willing to Objectively Defend You
“I just think the way she’s being characterized is wrong. And the fact that (her husband) made it to 76 (years old), I give all the credit to her,” he said. “She kept him going and put up with a lot of stuff you would not put up with for a minute in your own marriage. But she took the marriage vows seriously and stood by him.
“I will always defend her,” Bukszpan added, “even though I’m fully aware of numerous things she has done that were not that great.”
Yes, “not that great” likely means, “terrible.”
You’ve maybe made a noticeable, positive impression on someone with your behavior, sacrifices and effort for the benefit of others. If someone, despite your figurative warts, as in character flaws, is willing to stand up for you despite the very human, yet failings of yours, you’ve been given a valuable gift.
Not everyone is so fortunate to have such an ally step forward, risk being attacked and offer such high-level, meaningful, desirable support and helpful protection.
Your best self wasn’t invisible. It was seen, recognized and respected. Someone has decided to make it known so who you are can be viewed in totality.
Michael Toebe is a reputation and communications specialist at Reputation Intelligence and writes the Reputation Intelligence newsletter here on Substack and on LinkedIn. He helps individuals and organizations proactively and responsively with matters of trust, stakeholder relationships and reputation.
He has been a reporter for newspapers and radio, hosted a radio talk show, written for online business magazines, been a media source, helped people work through disputes, conflicts and crises and assisted clients with communications to further build, protect, restore and reconstruct reputation. LinkedIn profile.
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