'People Remember That for a Long Time'
Think and Act Wisely About Conduct When Negotiating
They are important facts to know and remember in the most emotional and difficult of situations and then apply with consistency with our actions.
“Your reputation matters a lot,” says Sam Altman, the CEO of OpenAI. “This reputation of being good to work with, that goes a long way. People remember that for a long time.”
We all know this to be true, that it gets remembered “a long time.”
Yet somehow, us as smart as we are, we do tend to forget or ignore this reality when our impulses get the better of us and we act in ways that give off the clear impression that we can care less about being ethical, moral and professional and pleasant with which to to work. We show we can care less about how others experience us and a having a healthy reputation.
We prefer, our communication and other behavior shows, to be disagreeable and selfishly, aggressively fight for power, entitlement, advantage and resources.
In other words, we’re painfully short sighted and reckless with risk management of reputation. We only care about dominating people in that moment. We rationalize our behavior with, let’s be honest, mental gymnastics and comforting lies.
Altman was communicating within the context of founders and negotiation regarding companies yet if you think a little more deeply you can see how really what he is saying applies to any professional interaction.
We should, in the vast majority of encounters, focus on “playing the long game,” as Altman says. Don’t try to exploit people merely because they might be vulnerable or there is a significant power disparity or situational power imbalance.
In reality, I contend, you are acting the fool with your reputation when you act this way. I’m not along in that assertion.
“I have seen people do incredible, long-term damage to their reputation, fighting,” Altman remembers and warns.
He’s correct when he offers wisdom: “It’s way more important for your future success as an investor that founders like you and I say, ‘that investor did the right thing by me.’”
And shouldn’t we all want, at minimum, others to think and communicate, if only to themselves but maybe others too, the same thing, that regardless of the intensity of a situation, we “did right” with them. It’s possible, probably not always, yet almost always, even when difficult decisions are seemingly the only choices.
We will build a reputation that opens doors, opens them more easily, and brings more opportunities our way. We will succeed with ethics and morality. We will also be people of greater character, more respectful to our fellow humans, without excuses.
Michael Toebe is a reputation consultant, advisor and communications specialist at Reputation Quality, assisting individuals and organizations with further building reputation as an asset or ethically protecting, restoring or reconstructing it.
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